My Last Breath
by Javelin the Silent One
Summary: Takes place in the Kratos storyline ending. One girl remembers one man...the idiot pervert and the love of her life. Sheelos


I don't own Tales Of Symphonia. It's Namco's game, as loath I am to admit it. On that same note, I don't own "My Last Breath" by Evanescence. So…yeah. BRING IN THE DANCING LOBSTERS!!!!!! 3

AUTHORESS SHPEEL!!!!

Hey, it's me again. I'm very glad to say that "If You Just Believe has gotten two reviews already. That's nothing compared to my older stories, but that's okay!! I'll just keep working at it. Personally, it's one of my fave fanfictions I've ever written. Kratos Lloyd Cute Father and Son scenes!!!

Of course, the romance aspect of the game is not so sophisticated, but I like it anyway. It leaves so much for interpretation—well, except for maybe Colette/Lloyd. That's obvious. Raine/Kratos or Regal isn't too good with me…I'm just not a fan of those pairings. Honestly…. Regal is so much cuter with Presea. Gesea pairings are just…odd. Considering how young Genis is….

Yeah. The couple I really only like after this one is Sheelos. For some reason, I like this coupling, even though I'm not particularly overly fond of Zelos himself. But I was playing the game, watching when Zelos died, and I was thinking, "How would Sheena react to that?" It would make a great pairing, really, if a melancholy, sad one at that.

So…here. Enjoy it.

Summary: Takes place in the Kratos storyline, when Zelos dies. One girl remembers the bittersweet taste of betrayal, and Zelos's blood—but she also remembers the warm, milky taste of his passion…and her love for him.

Rating: PG-13 for a suggestive passage and dark angst.

Notes: None really. Enjoy!!!

**__**

My Last Breath

By Harlequin Half-Light (love da Reflection)

The tower of Salvation, once a symbol of hope, and wonder, and the love of Martel for her mortal followers; now in shambles.

She walks forward, one step in front of the other. Her face is blank, auburn eye showing no expression. She does not come to pray to Martel, or save the world…she comes to honor the memory of one long passed away.

**__**

Hold on to me love

You know I can't stay long

All I wanted to say was I love you and I'm not afraid

It's still off in the distance, so far off…but she muddles on, through the forest and plains. She has come over the sea for this, to see his face. …How could she not continue on? Wouldn't she fall under scrutiny from those that trusted her?

They never understood her; never understood the tenderness there had been between head-whacking and caustic insults. Even from here, she can still see his vibrant blue eyes, his silky, blowing soft red hair in the breeze…that smelled like…

Even from here, she can sense the sweet spicy smell of cinnamon.

**__**

Can you hear me

Can you feel me in your arms

The pathway begins to show signs of wear and tear as she treads the path of dirt, past the rocks that are developing moss, underneath the Symphonia tree. She felt protected, safe almost. Mana washes through her, making her feel at peace with herself and with nature.

"No…I can't forget him." Her teeth tighten as she tries to banish the relaxation she feels. She is here to honor the "damned idiot" that had helped to save Colette, the man who had helped him as he simultaneously betrayed them, kept secrets.

She can see the steps in the distance. The shrine of the Eternal Sword, and the grave to the Chosen whose heart had stolen her away with him to Martel's paradise.

He had been a traitor, a friend, a pervert…and extremely sensual and romantic when he wanted to be.

**__**

Holding my last breath

Safe inside myself

She recalls a night in Meltokio, standing out on the balcony, shedding herself of the fancy dinner-party clothes she is clad in; underneath are her worn ninja clothes, the symbol of her true calling. The night, as a shadow…and not some fancy girl.

__

"Well well. To what do I owe the pleasure of you being here, my deliciously lovely hunny?

She starts and turns, rage on her face. At the same time, she feels strangely attracted to him; all the feelings of loneliness, betrayal, weakness, cowardice…like a river, they stream away, leaving her at peace. "ZELOS!!!! What are you doing here!?!?!? Get out, or I'll—"

"You can't rightly kick me out of my own room, sweetums," he comments, motioning to the room she had come through. She pauses, her face coloring, but only slightly, she swears. No more giving into this madness.

"What is it that you want…?"

The next memories that come to her next are so real that she can still smell the sweet cinnamon of his hair, and the icy contrast of mint on his breath and lips.

**__**

Are all my thoughts of you

Sweet raptured light it ends here tonight

Rage, desire, want—all flowed through her body like a waterfall. She feels what little defenses she made come down around her, crashing where the echo resides in her heart.

She pulls away, feigning revulsion. "GOD!!! Zelos, you perv, get away from—"

She stops as he sees her still gripping on to her hand, smiling his characteristic smile of ease and cheerfulness and…love? Dare she think that this ba—

"I want…I want you, Sheena," he breathes as he pulls her closer. She tightens, but doesn't resist.

"…Why?"

****

I'll miss the winter

A world of fragile things

"Me?" She tries to pull away; something hesitates, something pulls her back to his side. "…No. No, you don't want me. I'm a coward, a slut, a failure—"

He doesn't let her finish. "—And perhaps the most intelligent, free-willed person I have ever met," he whispers, all passing lust going from his eyes. "Who else but you, Sheena, can make me tremble in fear? Can resist my obvious charms and put confidence in the rest of the group?"

She stifles the urge to giggle. "…Obvious charm?"

He chuckles and pulls his lips closer. "You know you want it…."

"…Yes." And she places her lips on his, feels her legs swept out from underneath her and floating, floating until soft velvet touches her back….

****

Look for me in the white forest

Hiding in a hollow tree (come find me)

She lets the rest of her pretenses slide away, just like that night…their physical and spiritual unity, the feeling of sleeping in his arms, falling into slumber to the smell of fire and ice.

And as she approaches the stairs…as she climbs over uneasy rubble and walks up the glassy pathway, she clutches her fist tighter as she thinks that this hand that had stroked his hair and face was also the one to do away with him….

**__**

I know you hear me

I can taste it in your tears

Warmth runs in rivulets down her face, unbidden; it is the sign of love found, love lost…everything in between, mourning for what they shared, despair from what they could have been…and an unspeakable horror at what she herself did….

__

She kneels down beside him. She barely hears his banter about his sister Seles; just how his life was a complete mistake…and how sorry he truly was.

"Don't forget…to destroy…my Cruxis Cry…stal…….."

With his last breath, he looks at her. There are so many things in his eyes; sorrow, desire…and love, a warmth in death.

Most of all, there is relief.

Lloyd holds out the Crystal for her. "Sheena…."

Everything goes red as she grabs it and throws it on the ground and stomp and stomp and stomp—

****

Holding my last breath

Safe inside myself

"…Zelos."

She kneels down on the ground…there it is, the mark of blood, where his body had faded, where they had left it in honor. The Crystals' attributes had caused rapid decay…there was no scent of death around, no rotting flesh or skeleton to remind her.

All that was there was a small splash of browning blood…and small shards of his Crystal.

Her tears fall on the blood-stain, mixing with the dried liquid, lifting it up and swirling it around in salt, brown liquid.

"H-h…hello," she manages to stammer in a faltering voice.

**__**

Are all my thoughts of you

Sweet raptured light it ends her tonight

"We did it, Zelos…we saved the world." She tries to smile; it ends in a grimace. "The tree is alive…resurrected…a-and…."

Her eyes narrowed as tears began to streak down her face faster, like a waterfall—

And she makes fists of her hands and brings them down on the ground, the muffled pound echoing softly through the darkness, the night.

"YOU GODDAMNED IDIOT!!!!"

**__**

Closing your eyes to disappear

You pray your dreams will leave you here

She starts to sob as she curls up on the ground, next to where his body should be.

"Goddamned idiot!!! You knew, didn't you!!! You knew I was pregnant!!!" She sits up and smiles sadistically. "Yes, bastard, I'm having your brat. Congratulations!!! Thanks for leaving me alone!!!"

She begins to laugh maniacally, mirth of night shattering her soul and threatening to overtake her heart. She wants to feel his arms around her shoulder again…even her wrist, hand, god, even a finger would help….

**__**

But still you wake and know the truth

No one's there

But she opens her eyes when all that surrounds her is darkness, cold and unfeeling darkness. The stars twinkle down at her, the first of night—and he's in that night, the stars twinkling and winking like the mischievous light in his eyes.

Her body goes lax as a sob racks her body, then another and another as tears flow onto the ground, forming a small puddle beneath her as she cries and sobs and wishes for things to have come out differently.

**__**

Say goodnight

Don't be afraid

Calling me calling me as you fade to black

Slowly she stands. Somehow, for just a moment…peace fills her soul. "…I know you're in heaven, Zelos," she whispers. "And at night, when the stars come out, I'll point to the sky and say to our child, 'There's your father.'" She smiles. "I hope your happy."

There is silence…and she waits for the warmth to come.

It never does.

**__**

Holding my last breath

Safe inside myself

Something—panic—grips her soul. She turns around and bolts away, shuts her eyes and shuts out the world as she flees away from the memories, the guilt…the love she felt for him.

**__**

Are all my thoughts of you

Her limbs grow weary, she doesn't stop. She'll run until the point of death.

She's happy, she tells herself. For once, she can't feel

**__**

Sweet raptured light

For once…she can breathe.

**__**

It ends here tonight….


End file.
